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Astounding Tales​!​!​!

by Unidentified Funk Object

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1.
I was walking through a cornfield in the middle of the night When I looked up into the sky and saw a blinding light It was a UFO and it was coming in to land The door slid open and I saw a Mysterious Man He danced down the ramp and stood before me Took off his shades and looked me in the eye He said "Ur people got 2 come 2gether U got 2 groove or else U're gonna die" Extraterrestrial, show us how U move Come down 2 our world so we can emulate Ur groove Extraterrestrial, give us 1 more chance Funkify this broken world, I know we can remember how 2 dance His band beamed in and started laying down some funky thing On laser powered bass guitar and quantum theremin He started talking to me and I heard it in my head I didn't know his language but I knew just what he said "Ur species is heading 4 destruction Cuz Ur out of tune with the Cosmic Sound So call all Ur friends and boogie with me A funky revolution will go down"
2.
Zero Gravity 04:48
Late night shift sweeping floors at the observatory She was in the laboratory working late She was a woman of science mapping the position of the stars in the sky But tonight they were all in their right place She said "This world is weighing on me, but pretty soon I'll be flying free Gonna work on an orbital telescope satellite" And it's up outside the atmosphere but on a clear night you can see And she led me outside and took me by the hand as the stars were shining bright In zero gravity, we could live in a fantasy And when you're holding me, I could plot a trajectory In zero gravity, we'd be a singularity And when we're floating free, you could give all your love to me Well I ain't no mathematician babe and I don't know much of nuclear physics But I know when the chemistry feels right I said "I heard there was a force that can make two bodies be attracted to each other And I think I can feel that force tonight" I said "Take me with you when you go, I want to fly off into the sky We can leave behind all our worries and our blues Cuz there ain't no time to take it slow and we don't need to justify Because I know all about the science of the heart and I know that mine is in free fall over you"
3.
A spark of light ignites the dark, a creature moves across the land Energy crackles between synapses, we want to understand Bodies moving, bodies grooving Their lonely orbits in the dark Impulse arising, you're magnetizing my heart This is the science of love Gotta get my formula right This is the science of love Prove my hypothesis tonight This is the science of love Gotta verify that it's true This is the science of love Cuz we got some chemistry to do Well I think and therefore I am, and therefore I've got to find The underlying principle for why you're always on my mind Because I got a theory, you could be near me I want to put it to the test Cause a reaction, our interaction is best Well if E+MC^2, you will be my guiding light And I will work in the laboratory late into the night Righting equations and calculations Experimenting, taking notes Till I discover you are my lover, I'll know
4.
S/he: Wake up little man, look around if U can U're about 2 go on an adventure He: What's happened to me? Is this some kind of dream? Or an alternate dimension? S/he: U're aboard my ship, going to go on a trip Of discovery and pleasure He: This is going too far, I don't know what you are An alien or whatever S/he: U know I'm liking U, I like the things U do He: Well that is very nice for sure, But I'm afraid of you S/he: And if U take a chance today I think U'll be amazed He: I feel like I should run away They: But at the same time, fascinated These close encounters of the 3rd kind R gonna blow my mind S/he: So step in my groove cuz I like how U move And I know that U wanna party He: Well ma'am, I mean sir, I'm flattered for sure But I really should be departing S/he: Have a drink on me. Do U like what U see? Do U want 2 hold my raygun? He: You know I'm afraid of the things that you say But I can't look away S/he: I know what U're curious about I'll show U what I got He: You know I'd really rather not, But thank you for the thought S/he: Sit back and smell my pheromones Cuz I got time U know He: Don't know if I'm prepared to go S/he: Yes U can go They: Where no man has gone before These close encounters of the 3rd kind R gonna blow my mind S/he: Hang on 2 Ur heart cuz I'm skilled in the art Of cross-species seduction He: Let's take it slow, take our time you know It's my first alien abduction S/he: We can take our time, just open Ur mind And tell me which way U want it He: Let's get it on then, one small step for man It's time to make first contact They: These close encounters of the 3rd kind R gonna blow my mind These close encounters, these close encounters Thought we were alone but some1 found us These close encounters, these close encounters Alien love is all around us

credits

released June 9, 2013

Produced by Ed Renzi and Greg Melchin
Recorded and engineered by Ed Renzi

Musicians:
Greg Melchin: vocals, bass, theremin, Suzuki Omnichord, keyboards, percussion
Brendan Melchin: drums, percussion, backing vocals
Jenny MacDonald: lead vocals on Close Encounters and backing vocals
Ross Avey: guitar, backing vocals
James Spray: keyboards, percussion, backing vocals
Christian Dufault: percussion
Martin Davidson: tenor sax
Jordan Tunney: trumpet
Eszter Horvath: backing vocals
Kerry MacSwain: backing vocals
Ed Renzi: Backing vocals, percussion, producing wizardry

All music and lyrics by Greg Melchin

Cover art by Jay Rawding

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Unidentified Funk Object Halifax, Nova Scotia

Unidentified Funk Object brings interplanetary grooves beamed from the funkiest depths of space to Ur dancefloor. Dr. G's far-out theremin and the band's stone-cold funk take Ur body and soul 2 another plane of existence. Ahh yeah.

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